He sits next to me, observing the World. Listening to the World. His eyes searching for evidence of what he is hearing, scanning the landscape around us. He sits quietly, not leaning in, just close enough. Close enough to feel the heat of my body, and the energy of Belonging pulling us together.
When he looks at me in those moments, he tilts his head up towards me and holds my gaze. He doesn’t redirect his body, which is always ready to live in the World; he just gazes upward, sinking his focus into my Being, the unity we feel in our togetherness, the gleam and twinkle in his eyes melting my center into Wonder.
Only when he wants to play with me does he position his body right at me, asking for my full attention on the task between us: throw that ball, Mama! Pick up that stick! No!, not that one… THIS ONE!!! And he moves his eyes from my face to my hands, to the stick or the ball, and he calculates the trajectory of my throw, and seamlessly he bolts, full force, his body a thing of awe…

Belloceans Marvelous MAESTRO
21st July, 2008 – 25th March, 2022

As I sat on the steps this first morning alone, I said, “I’m going to have to learn to see beyond my physical eyes to remain with you”.
He said, “ You will do anything to be able to see me now… You will open yourself up to a whole New World to be able to see and feel me now…”
“And as a result, you will listen to the World with dog ears, so that you can see it from my perspective; so that you can anticipate what I am listening to now”.

And then he told me not to cry.

But I can’t stop.

I am crying because of how he loved me. Because of the extent to which he saw fit to love me. That is how to love… following every move, the way he followed mine; Curiously, Generously, with the utmost of Anticipation…

He’s sitting next to me now, following the World. As I could be following the World on his behalf. And he turns his little, young upstart face toward me, but holds me with his vibrant, mature gaze. Then he steps his front paws up on my leg and reaches that wet, black nose to my face before licking it in a frenzy of enthusiasm. He’s being clear; there is no here or there, no then or now, there is only Us.
And so, the World, as I have been dulled into seeing it, cannot separate Us. Love cannot be destroyed or severed, and he really did teach me to love in the most perfected way.

Unity above All.
Focus above All.
Play above All.
Affection Always.
Expectation Always.
Kisses and Leaning In, as the answer to Everything hard.
Adventure Always.
Us. Us. Us.
Always.

There is Freedom in sensing him now. In his courageous destiny to move ahead before me, age before me, become a sage before me, he is showing me Freedom is possible Now.
Because we are One, and my Heart will not accept anything less.

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